Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Things got worse...

I thought everything would be fine but things got worse. Worse than what I thought. I thought I could sitting down and talking nicely with him but he didn't accept my good intention. I was trying to end up everything nicely yesterday, mid night. But, he hurt me badly. Everytime when I try to talk nicely, with cooling tone but he rejected my kindness. Like I was forcing him to answer me what I wanna know. No.. I was not. I said the past is a past I wouldn't hope to get any explanation from him. I just want to know what is the condition now. I don't expect what would he say but I just say something that he wants to say. But he rejected me. He once again insulted me. He said he didn't know how to answer me.. Was it that tough? Nevermind. Since he is so selfish, since he wanna keep torturing me. I can't depends on him anymore. I have to depend on myself to get rid of these and stand on my own to settle everything.. Why? I had took the first step and why don't you just give me some pride?

[03:51:19 AM] --: i........................................
[03:51:20 AM] --: no la
[03:51:29 AM] --: sure we r fren
[03:51:29 AM] --: y say so lol
[03:51:31 AM] Aphrodite: whatever la...
[03:51:39 AM] Aphrodite: im alright now...:D
[03:51:47 AM] Aphrodite: just, we're still best friends right?
[[03:52:03 AM] --: yaya
[03:52:14 AM] --: just just...............
[03:52:21 AM] --: i donno how to say la.....................
[03:52:26 AM] Aphrodite: say it frankly la..
[03:52:27 AM] --: just dun listen to others (I dont understand wat did he mean by that)
[03:52:29 AM] Aphrodite: dun keep it la
[03:52:42 AM] Aphrodite: everything has to make a nice ending right?
[03:52:50 AM] Aphrodite: i wanna end all of these, get me?
[03:53:06 AM] --: okok
[03:53:18 AM] --: dun la talk to me like command me :S (another thing that confused me since I didn't)
[03:53:43 AM] Aphrodite: wat did u mean by dun listen to others??
[03:53:59 AM] Aphrodite: i m not commanding u ler fren..:S
[03:54:25 AM] --: no la...
[03:54:35 AM] --: just like that lo
[03:54:52 AM] Aphrodite: anything, jst say it out now lor,,,k?
[03:55:31 AM] --: can i say no? (he was avoiding)
[03:55:41 AM] Aphrodite: maybe last time we din talk properly and everything get worse...
[03:57:08 AM] Aphrodite: i din expect wat u wanna say for de past, but jst for now.. i know, u know, everything is end right.;)
[03:58:06 AM] Aphrodite: jst bcz of the unproper explanation, then I was so confused all de way. and I dun wanna let myself like that, u know right? dun worry bout me, I'm cool ok...
[03:58:50 AM] Aphrodite: ...there?
[03:59:05 AM] --: yar.......... (started changing topic)
[03:59:06 AM] --: so when u come bek??
[03:59:12 AM] --: hav to wait u 4 king kong huh??
[03:59:15 AM] Aphrodite: wednesday.
[03:59:16 AM] Aphrodite: ya la..
[03:59:30 AM] Aphrodite: wait, u still... nvm la...
[04:01:07 AM] Aphrodite: watever...
[04:01:33 AM] Aphrodite: u really dun wish to mention those thing??
[04:02:09 AM] --: coz all the question u ask i donno how to answer
[04:02:46 AM] Aphrodite: ha.. hm.. then I have to depends on myself to end up these lor.. have to stand on my own since u dun wish to make things clearer....
[04:02:47 AM] --: n summore im just like the way u treat me as u r Shella
[04:03:34 AM] --: i donno y once u talk bout this im always feel that not really comfortable
[04:03:53 AM] --: not i don wan to
[04:04:03 AM] --: just i donno how to
[04:04:05 AM] Aphrodite: im not forcing u, u have to know that. Im now already cool with that, get me?[04:04:15 AM] Aphrodite: u mean de way i treat u still like b4?
[04:04:46 AM] --: c.... im confusing again
[04:05:15 AM] Aphrodite: as i said.. since u wanna leave it like that, then i hafta stand on my own, let time pass then i would be alright
[04:05:27 AM] Aphrodite: dun worry bout me ok... and dun afraid of me..
[04:05:31 AM] Aphrodite: we're friends....
[04:05:50 AM] Aphrodite: Things in future, no one knows...
[04:06:04 AM] Aphrodite: I'm not de one who need u to worry anymore, get me?
[04:06:30 AM] --: u get me???????????/ (he was mad at me)
[04:06:46 AM] --: i dun know hw to GET U!!!!!!!!1
[04:06:52 AM] Aphrodite: ok ok...
[04:07:33 AM] Aphrodite: do u think is it hard for us to friend now? I'm just wanna make things simple, treat u as my friend..
[04:07:42 AM] Aphrodite: but u seems like, unwilling ...
[04:09:29 AM] --: no la...
[04:10:03 AM] --: i mean .......... the "get me?" word.......
[04:10:03 AM] --: its makes me insane
[04:10:13 AM] --: sorry (please, don't appologize to me..)
[04:10:30 AM] Aphrodite: ok
[04:10:47 AM] Aphrodite: tht's nothing la...m just scared u dun understand ma..haiyo..
[04:10:50 AM] Aphrodite: watever la...

Is that a wrong if I post these up? Whatever, just few of my friends know. And I wish to let them know.. Even I'm not gonna post it, I'll tell them. But these, I wanna keep for a lesson so that I won't ask him anymore...
Guys sucks! Selfish!!! Treat him as de way I used to treat him?? I didn't!! I didn't!!! Even if I am but I had try to fake myself in front of him!! What else U want from me???!!!!!!! Leave me alone to mend my broken heart?? U make me look like an idiot! Like a stupid!!

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