Thursday, January 19, 2006

Vague future...

Seriously, I don't know what am I suppose to do after graduate. Maybe it's kinda early for me to talk about that since I haven't done my foundation year. I thought I just wanna get a cert from MMU and do what I want after graduation, as an stewardess. I don't really wish to tell other people besides my family and best friends, maybe I don't have de confidence. Alex hopes that I can get into a guaranteed company like Shell.. When I heard what he told me, frankly, de benifits are good enough... Kinda seducing man... Then how? How bout de aspiration to stewardess? Perhaps I shouldn't put too much hope onto it. I should have have a higher, better, greater job for my own... But.. sigh.. this is reality.. Cant achieve what you really want but just have to go for what makes you better.

I've been thinking, wake up to reality doesn't mean fully recovered. Like him.. I knew what is really going on but just need time to cure the pain. when I got know something, I told myself it was not my business and tried not to ask more. I can do that sometimes. But sometimes, just can't... When I was cleaning my room this afternoon, I saw the key chain. The pink heart with angle wings. I bought him one, was blue in color. But I think now it's no longer on de desk or somewhere else. I think it's inside a storage box... A storage box...
Tamm said I'm sealing my heart for not letting other people to come in.. Is it? I'm not sure. I wish to find someone that truly loves me, appreciate me.. But.. I dun think that this kind of person still exist. Sometimes even think that just wanna flirt around. But.. it's so bad to do that... Why can't I just leave love affair from my life for a moment? Really admire those who can stand still when they meet loves, as in loves from de opposite sex.
You're right, that's why a guy called guyz... That kind of selfish and disappreciable!! Hate you hate you I hate you!!!!!!!!!!!!

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